Crime Wave

Today, on my walk to work, I passed a dead body. It was covered with a sheet, but clearly a dead body. (Sorry, no photo.)

Tonight, I declined a return that struck me as fishy. A book we don't sell, no receipt, and he happened to have the price sticker in his wallet when I told him it wasn't one that Borders carried. I called the store it came from (Union Square Borders) and they no longer sell it either. Sorry, buddy, no go.

Then a seller reported over the walkie talkies that he saw a couple filling their bags with DVD's. I was in the office at the time and the supervisor confronted the woman, who lied about having them, but he persisted and she gave them up. They were still in the store so they hadn't technically stollen anything. I called the mall security but the couple left before they showed up.

Just seconds after talking to the mall security our gates went off and I saw a man leaving the store in a hurry with several very large books under his arm. Maybe it was because I was so worked up about the last incident but without thinking I took off after the guy. He went down the escalators, I went down the escalators. One set of escalators wasn't working and an old lady was dragging down a rolling suitcase blocking my way (Battleship Potemkin?) but I finally caught up with him at the door.

"Got a receipt for that?" He mumbled something. I moved between him and the door and he offered up the books and started to leave. Unknown to me the security guard had seen me chase after him and was right behind him.

"Was he shoplifting?" he asked.
"Yes."
"You want to press charges?"
"Yes."

The guy tried to run and they ended up wrestling on the sidewalk. Very dramatic. Put him in cuffs, took him to the office and called the cops, who eventually showed up.

My supervisor called me a Ninja and told me if this had been New Orleans the guy would probably have shot me. I never considered my personal safety. I never felt afraid, or even that mad (OK, a little mad). I have to admit it was rather satisfying.

When I told Robin about what happened, he teased me about putting some kid in jail (it wasn't a kid) and I said some words I never use. I said he was a fucking thief.

"What?"

"He's a fucking thief."

I think I made my point.